Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Five suggestions for resurrecting love

The loss of a loved one can have a devastating effect.   It can be especially difficult to overcome when the loved one left voluntarily.  No it wasn’t a death or an illness that took them away.  It was the break-up, the end of a relationship whether it entailed marriage or a mutual agreement of being together as one.  Over time life became or appeared to become so complicated that you just couldn’t take anymore.  The many things that could bring forth a smile now annoys to the point of etching a permanent frown on the face.  The time where the thought of being without that person could bring you to tears has passed only to be replaced by the tears that come from being with that person. 

The heart wants what it wants when and whom it may want—even if the one it wants no longer shares the emotion.  I don’t know if the organ can physically break in half, but it darn sure can feel like it has when pain enters its domain.  The sun doesn’t appear to shine as bright and the darkness of night isn’t welcome. 

Every love song being played on the radio or on the ever-present new wave listening device reminds you of lost times and the one that got away.  Your entire being screams, “What’s wrong with me?  Why couldn’t he/she love me for me?”  Answers don’t come with the questions and self-doubt creeps in like an uninvited guest that refuses to leave.  And the pain…oh my gosh…the pain.  No other word can aptly do it justice.  It can be explained in graphic detail, but in the end it all comes back to, pain. 

The ability to love can lead to the possibility of being hurt.  But even though there’s a probability of that fact, it shouldn’t make us run from love.  Life is full of the flip side of the coin.  Can we avoid or escape the negatives of life?  NO!  Can we take every encounter of life and learn and grow from them?  YES!
Life is love and love is life and all that comes with it.  Listed below are five suggestions for living a life of resurrected love:
1.    Seek to love yourself unconditionally: learn to accept that you are human and  capable of making mistakes.  Check yourself before trying to correct others.

2.    Seek to forgive yourself: once you make the inevitable mistakes, learn from them and move past them.  Be open to forgiving others.

3.    Seek to live with an open heart and mind: don’t block your blessings with self-imposed limitations.

4.    Seek to not settle for less than: don’t pick a mate based on your own shallowness, i.e. the car he/she drives or how good he/she may look.

5.    Seek to be honest with yourself at all times: the first partaker of a lie is the one speaking it.

 Remember we cannot make anyone love us, but we can certainly love ourselves.